Be Forewarned, I am a Fey and Quixotic Creative Writer

Be Forewarned, I am a Fey and Quixotic Creative Writer
And in the End was the Word, Amy's Word

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Monday, July 31, 2017

How Do You Perceive Status?

As a young girl I developed a discomfort with status.  This was after I had lived in a foreign country during my formative years 2-5.  Arriving in USA at age six was like coming to a whole new world.  I must of realized that doctors (my father was a doctor) have high status and I became uncomfortable with status.  I wanted to be like everybody else, not special or exalted.  As an RN I deal with status in my role in society.  As a labeled bipolar entity I am threatened with a "less than" status which I am equally uncomfortable with.  When I get a mean comment, like last week, where my reviews are treated as aberrant behavior from a "less than" in society, rather than a critical review from an educated woman I become agitated.  I do not become agitated enough to lose my compassionate stance in life, though.  I can see where others are more comfortable with their status and see that as a means to look down on others.  My review of Cindy Lane Newcomb's treatment of me was not attention seeking, like she implied.  I am not an attention seeking little less than entity.  I am an educated professional person, anyone's equal.  Others might not have my intuition or compassion.

 I have worked as a nurse for years and years, as a hospice nurse in fact.  I have a special connection with the dead.  I have lessened the suffering of many in their final hours.  I might have been the last connection some have had to a caring individual in their final hours.  People when they are transitioning to the other side are in a very special place and I am honored to be a part of their journey as a nurse.  I also have connections with other types of people in society treated as less than, like the mentally retarded. (pc developmentally disabled)  These people, with their sufferings are very angelic.  I have been honored to work with them.  I see each person as a special individual....all people.  I have worked in the jail system as well.  I have compassion for all and do not desire myself to be elevated above anybody.  My role as a nurse necessitates some sort of elevation but I see it as a service role.

Friday, July 28, 2017

Leo Debuts in His First Cat Video

Little brown fancy knows she has the advantage.  She looks a little plump.


Wednesday, July 26, 2017

The Care of Plants, Animals, and Coincidence

The greening of the aloe plants is happening before our eyes.






The plant vibe I get is one of relief and expectation.....




Tuesday, July 25, 2017

Widdle Bitty Wion Cwub Weo

When I was a little girl I considered myself a cat person and even subscribed to the Cat Fancy magazine.  Then Jenny, my spirit jin dog came into my life and I became more dog oriented.  Dogs are much more of a commitment than cats, with the walking and all.  A few weeks ago a cat hung around in the dark on rainy nights meowing plaintively alternating with a commanding yeowl.  I did not trust this tricolor cat and decided I would shoo her away with a water bottle squirt attack.  I did not have to, it was as though she got the telepathic message and stayed away.  I imagine she had a family somewhere close or was ferrel, but after the tale of the Vampire cat I was not up for taking in a stray.....until...this morning.

I came into the laundry mat and a young black guy told me he had just let in this kitten (I termed it a widdle bitty wion cwub.)  He saved it from being hit on main street.


When my encounter occurred with Kali-cat the vampire, a sage old cat advised me not to react with violence towards her, which I did not.  This cat was named Leo and lived in a flower shop.  Widdle bitty wion cwub has similar coloring and markings as Leo had.  I did not rush into deciding to rescue this little lost orphan, I thought it through, did a coin toss (which I disobeyed) and talked it over with a young girl in the laundry matt.  A generous middle aged gentleman from Israel paid for my drying time as I had no remaining quarters and Tops gave me a dollar off Purina Kitten Chow with an immediate coupon.  My economics improved markedly yesterday with a new job and I guess the spirit of cat is stalking me, wanting me to be with a kitten.  I named him Leo after the sage  cat Leo.  I also noticed a cob web on his head that looked like a halo around his ears.  I have a theory that some pets are really angels in disguise.


He chose the guest bunk bed for his nap.  I then went to the Post office and who is parked next to me when I came out?  The animal control officer.  I  went and knocked on his window and asked if he comes out on late rainy nights for ferrel cats which he did not answer.  Instead he told me about his barn cats and the kittens the wandering Tom has sired.  That is the meaning of irony.  He was a very sweet old man character.  I told him about the kitten in the laundry mat.   I counselled with a friend and we agreed a poster of CAT FOUND should be put up, just in case somebody is missing da widdle bitty wion cwub weo.

I refuse to claim the title Cat Thief into my criminal dossier.



On Plants

 If you can care for plants then you can progress to caring for people and animals.  I believe he is right.  As an eleven year old girl, I had a plant collection on my window sill.  They only partially obscured the view from the neighbor boy's window, but they tried, anyway.  I had spider plants, a huge avocado that I had started from seed, little orange trees I had started, baby tears, and a few others that I cannot recall.  This is the blue coffee pot my mother gave me as a child for me to water my plants with.  My son asked for it, and I told him, yes you can have it, after I am dead.



My mother opened "The Plant Store" and that is where I had my first working experience at age 16 and 17 on Crane Street, Clifton Springs.  This store was not really a florist, it was more like a houseplant and accessory store.  It had hanging  baskets, and an assortment of greenery like ferns, norfolk island pines, etc.  When I went off to Ithaca College I brought a norfolk Island pine with me.

My father was an organic gardener when I was a teenager and his favorite herb was comfrey.  We would feed it to our chickens.  My children have cuttings from those very same plants.  Dad made a poultice for my arm when I injured it in a bicycle accident in 1975.
This plant, maybe called a lipstick plant was one of my fathers.



I have and old antique table which held my plants at the farmhouse on 3023 Taylor road.  My mother would come and scold me that I was not taking good enough care of them. I had a theory that a sign of my good mental state was when my plants looked healthy.

My mothers mother, Bessy was known for her lovely African violets.  My mother related that her secret was feeding them her leftover Tea.  I have grown African Violets as well, with varying levels of success.



This is a donkey's tail that was my mothers, she passed away in 2001.


My daughter is a plant person and so is my son.  They both have lovely gardens.  My son is known for his great garlic and my daughter even grows her own leeks.

My son has a burn plant which I offered to put into intensive care for him.  It came with  his purchase of his home.  This Aloe was in sad shape.  I had noticed that one I neglected was able to resurrect itself with proper care, so I offered to help him with his in exchange for some of the cuttings.    These photos are in reverse time order.  The top photo is more recent.  As you can see, they are greening up.




When one is caring for children, babies, it is easy to let plant care slide. 
This christmas cactus is a fragment of one that was given to me by my son for my birthday in 2002.  My mother made the ceramic head planter and I made her eye open and gave her color.  The cactus needs fertilizer, which I gave it this morning..
 Many believe plants have a level of consciousness and that you must talk to your plants to share vibrations with them.

One time a gal pal brought me her croton to resurrect, but I figured it was past saving and I insulted her and tossed it.  I have my plant sins, to ya know.

Monday, July 24, 2017

Some Spirit Poppets Speak

John the Baptist has a message for all caught up in Amy's
review of Cindy and Chris.  He says all will be right if they repent of their sins toward Amy.  They don't perceive of any of the parties as being evil, only human.  Humans can get caught up in status and money.


John is posing with his mother and father, Elizabeth and Zachariah. In time and space the parents of John were not alive when John was an adult.  In heavenly time they are all together.  Just like you are when you speak to a world renown medium like Cindy.
Rasputin, another misunderstood maligned mystic agrees.


Sunday, July 23, 2017

Evil Entrepreneurs ?

People liked to characterize me as being evil when I was manic.  I don't believe that I was evil, but I saw much evil in the world.  I had conspiracy theories and theories that people were cannibals.  I wrote scary letters to former friends and acquaintances explaining my theories about our society.  I would stop in and chat at shops and places of business.  One such spot was Cindy Lane -Newcomb's "healing" establishment.  I went in a few times and blabbed about my theories.  They nodded and I went on my way.  I stopped in when I was transitioning from ill to well.  She called her secretary into her office in front of me and I heard them laughing behind semiclosed doors.  The secretary said, "Cindy will call you" and he asked for my number.  Cindy has a talent for speaking with the dead.  I was interested to talk with her regarding my poppets, which I believed were spirit poppets.  She never called me and she never answered my email. Her actions or lack of proved to me that she is not very talented at healing or even a very caring individual.




As you can see she has an alphabet soup after her name.


She might just give you a big old iron shaft.  There are two warning iron shafts in her door stoop. Her establishment is called Raven's landing.  I was not given a landing spot.

I have and equally interesting story to share about her son.  He operates a pawn style shop a few blocks away.  His signs says "We Buy Gold".  He practically steals gold especially from dim witted mental patients.  I went to him with some rings and he took advantage of my compromised mental state.  I sold him ring that I paid a couple thousand dollars for three hundred and I traded a fourteen karate princess cut quarter karate diamond ring for some ten karate hollow gold earrings.  He would not make the deal right after I came to my senses.

There are good people in the world but this mother and son are not to be trusted.  This is a fair review of two people who showed their true colors to a person they thought was less than them and not mentally with it.

By the way, they are not allied with each other.  The son will come right out and say his mother is a fake.

I told him he was going to get a bad review in return for not making the deals we made more fair.  He said "a Deal is a deal."  I was going there when I was in the process of remortgaging my home.  He wanted to buy it from me for way less than it was worth.  He saw a person in need and in desperation and was trying to take all he could.  His name is Chris.  This little red barn is where he conducts his evil schemes to rob the desperate.  His mother robs the emotionally desperate, I would conclude, as she has no healing gift (in my experience) and he robs the financially desperate.
7
Chris is especially proud of his blue eyes, and Aryan ancestry.  I know this as he told me so.  He and his mother look very much alike.

Saturday, July 22, 2017

High Functioning and Logical

I have been getting a lot of blog reads.  The writings of late 2015 and 2016 were quite imaginative.  I cannot say that I hold the same eccentric beliefs that I held during those times when I was unmedicated.  I have taken psych drugs for years and when I went off my medications my brain went into a withdrawal state and I had many bizarre thoughts which I shared on my blog.  I still believe that I was given drugs initially that made it appear that I had bipolar.  Now that I have taken toxic drugs for years, (30) my brain is injured and cannot function without the medications.  It can function, correction, but not in a way compatible with society's expectations.

I am currently on what I call, my "shut up shot" and I am very high functioning.  I have been cleaning cottages for two months and do a fine job.  I am going back to my nursing career.  I have mended several friendships and am interacting appropriately with most people, most of the time.  My family relationships are also stable and congenial.  If there are any other people who have known me in the past and I have estranged, I would welcome any outreaches.  

Tuesday, July 18, 2017

Tuesday Night Self Portraits





I have not sketched in months!

Sunday, July 16, 2017

I Touched a Bunny

I was in my garden removing the poke weed and other poisonous plants when I came upon a baby rabbit.  I was unsure if it was in good health as it had not fled upon hearing my footsteps.  I reached out and touched it and said, "Are you okay?" where upon it darted  under the rose bushes.

Mother rabbit must be quite appreciative that I risked jail time to give her and her litter a home.  In college I was taught that in addition to the horrors of racism that there is also a societal affliction called "species -ism".  The rabbits in the neighborhood must gather together and share that "our lives matter as well."  They must be distraught about these humans and there self centered views..  I am especially interested if humans are reincarnated to animals to be taught a lesson about self importance.

I am not a criminal, so I will have to follow the human's directive to mow down the grass, even though doing so will destroy a haven for the little rabbits.  Interestingly the rabbits have not eaten my tomatoes, basil, parsley or sunflowers.  The have enough grass I suppose.

Friday, July 14, 2017

Beaten into Lawn Submission

The conformists have beaten me with their desire for my lawn to match theirs.  Someone called the code officer after the party with all the wild animals and birds in my yard.  I got a letter today which was quite dishonest.  It claimed my front lawn as well as the back was out of conformance to code.  I have mowed the front within the last three weeks and it is not over ten inches.  I was saddened to see that code officers exaggerate claims.  The law is to be honored and respected but when they lie, they lose my respect.  I have tomatoes and parsley, basil, sunflowers and some wildflowers in my attempt at a garden in the back yard.  These lawn enforcers
 
cannot just march in here and plow down my garden with a mower.  I called and emailed pictures to prove that my lawn was not over ten inches and I mowed the front and the back where I could.   The back will need a weed wacking.  My son has promised to do such tomorrow.  The code officer threatened me with fines and jail time.  JAIL TIME.

I wrote in my email that the planet is dying because of all these motors and that the survivors will most certainly have a greater respect for a more naturalized look.  There will be a day of reconning for people who fail to love and respect the natural world.  Weeds are often healing herbs and can be quite beautiful.  I will share a photo of Queen Annes Lace in the morning when it is light out .....on their dying day.





Thursday, July 13, 2017

Blue Jay Tune





This is an example of my ballad style.  I just belt out a song.  It is really difficult as one must think of the tune and words and have it make sense.

DO NOT SING YOUR OWN SONGS!!

In our family there are different types of thinking patterns.  I am a person who thinks in abstractions and possibilities.  While I was off of my thought control medication I could improvise songs about myself and our family.  I became a ballad singer.  When I got my shut up shot my creativity was stifled somewhat.  I can still rattle off an improvised ballad but much to the consternation and disapproval of my daughter.

She was always very intelligent as a child and a baby but she is very conformist.  This conformity is based on a sense of shame over my bipolar.  The other family, my ex's, are very much a group of "what would the neighbors think" type of folks.  I am comfortable being different as I have had no choice.

I believe that my family poisoned me and caused me to hallucinate and therefore lose my credibility and spontaneous spirit.  When medicated a person cannot come back with a quick comment.  I was dulled down and given a phoney diagnosis because members of my family did not like me.

When I sang my spontaneous song about my daughter's family a quick "stop that now" response ensued.  Her response to  my innocent harmless creative spirit proves that I am a victim.  I don't believe she consciously victimizes me, she is an innocent piece of molded clay by the people who have felt threatened by my outspoken bold spirit.   She has been dutifully molded by my ex-inlaws.  She is a conformist like them, marching in full step with them.

The amazing thing is that she does not perceive herself as a conformist, but she most certainly is.  My singing is a harmless expression.  She sang her American states song, not an original and that was an example of allowed behavior.  "Don't be original Mom, I cannot tolerate that.   This is how to sing."

She is very intelligent, but her psychic wings are voluntarily clipped and her imagination clouded.

One might say, "she has been terrorized by your illness."  I have never done anything violent while ill, only with my personal art.  I am not a dangerous person,  I call myself a Ghandi girl.  The true terrorists are those who hate me and have poisoned her mind with negative possibilities and perceptions.  True, I am not myself when having tripping flash backs, and withdrawal symptoms but I am not violent and do not need to be scolded not to sing freely.

Monday, July 10, 2017

Snow White Missed the Party in my Backyard

My naturalized garden in the back yard is delighting me immeasurably.  While I sat a distance away I watched many birds and small mammals at the feeder.  Here is the list.  Mr Jay warned of Mr. Raven passing overhead.  Ms Rabbit liked the long grass and the large dandelion leaf.  The mourning doves were shy and waited on the roof top.  The family of sparrows (five or six) came in with a flurry after I said, where are all the sparrows.  Mr. Chickadee was alone.  The Jay couple came in turns multiple times (feeding babies in the cedars near by, I imagine.) A couple of youthful squirrels bounced in and thought that they could fool me by hiding behind their tales.  The cardinal sang to us and came in for some bites.  The tiny chipping sparrow hung around. The squirrels and the rabbit were totally comfortable nearby each other.  There was not much quarrelling or greediness noted.     I thought I had ten total,but I can only come up with nine.

Where was Snow White in this scene?  Luckily the lawn police where not around.  Nice thing was that for a half hour there were no leaf blowers or lawn mowers blaring, just an occasional airplane coming in for a landing at the nearby airport, and a family telling each other good bye with 'I love yous' in the distance.

Saturday, July 8, 2017

The War Against Women

When I was in a accelerated mental frame of mind, I realized that after WWII came the War Against Women.  I noticed a post in the Hopewell government court office.  1946 Dinner dance, of the Highschool Honor society.  It came to me that after the war, a war that women at home helped to win (by entering the workforce at home) intellectual women became the next target.  Intellectual woman can think obviously and their focus is often social concerns.  After the war it was realized by men in power, that women raise sons and women are more compassionate by nature due to mothering tendencies.  The Nazi's dismantled the family to raise less compassionate, more nationalistic members of society.  Generally speaking , when thinking about WWII we envision USA on the side of the allies.  Not all Americans were against the Nazis as evidenced by the Nazi doctors being taken in by the USA (CIA)after the war.  Women with their nurturing tendencies are less tolerant of crimes such as the war crimes of the Nazis.

After the war, the Bimbo  image of brainless women came popular, as with the Barbie Doll, among men.  Men can feel threatened by an intelligent woman.  Making women stupid and pretty and just a sex object is a calculated move by the elite to disempower women.  When young girls fear feminism and fail to embrace their own right to an intellectual image the men in power steer to flock of female sheep.  These little stupid lambs embrace their stupidity as a source of attraction.  Some of the men in society find this imagery emblematic of all women.  Men might then find other men more appealing if they think most women are ditzes.  Marilyn Monroe, while coming across as stupid and fragile was actually very intellectual which is why she was murdered. (I believe she was murdered).

Once upon a time I was pro gay rights but something I read from a Roman Catholic man made me realize that there was something bigger going on, as in a war against the traditional family and mostly against women.  Like the ancient Greeks, our culture is embracing men with men and in the process lessening women.  Men see the power of women and want it for themselves, rather than embracing a female.  They want to take the female power.  I heard that statement in the movie Witches of Eastwick.  The devil character, says, "Its women who have the power. "  There is a power struggle in society between men and women.  The society further expands on this struggle.  The statement the personal is the political, by a famous female women's rights activist exemplifies this. (Carol Hanish) This is even more true as creepy medical scientists do sex changes on people and demand we not punish these poor mixed up souls.  I am not advocating being cruel to sex change victims.  I believe that they are victims of a very sick society focused on destroying the strong mother, the thoughtful woman, the caring wife, the angry woman, and the innocent young girl and the outspoken crone.

If you are a man or woman with gender issues, please think about how society is messed up and messing you up before you let them mutilate your body.

Friday, July 7, 2017

Review of Despicable Me 3

Despicable Me 3 has huge moral downfalls.  It is not recommended for children's innocent psyches and not because of the little minions in jail clothes.  The real issue is the attack on the word "Evil" Brat.  This movie is trying to take away the meaning of evil which is the posture of moral relativists.  Evil Brat, the villain, is a balding adult getting revenge on Hollywood.  There is evil in the world.  One evil I can think of is the sexualization of children.  Despicable me 3 hints at that evil with symbolism.

 There is the fluffy unicorn desire of the sweet innocent little girl.  The unicorn horn, (a phallic symbol) is found in a bar by the wandering little girl.  She sees it at the bar and wants to find her magical unicorn.  This seems like a reference about women going to bars looking for a man.  An innocent little girl all wrapped up in a quest for a phallic symbol? That is obviously a reference to the sexualization of a child.  She finds a one horned baby goat and thinks it is a unicorn.  Goats in the bible are the lost souls.
Next with the other older daughter, she gets instructed by her adoptive mother to eat the piece of cheese in the Mayday dance of the common people of FREE-donia.  She eats the cheese and is betrothed to the little boy with small green boots, who nobody else wants.  What does the color green symbolize?  Virgin.  What do small boots mean?  There is a societal reference to small boots meaning small phallus.  Once again we have a reference to the phallus and the little girl.

The movie puts on upbeat fun music around Evil Brat, making the word evil glamorized.  He dances and is a fun character.  Balding man who is not a child mixed with child imagery.  The writers of this story are trying to say that there is no difference between adult and child which is what pedophiles think.  This is a pedophile movie.  Evil Brat has a Robot toy made of himself that he operates to try to send hollywood to outer space.


Gru has an evil twin who is funny and evil.  Therefore, once again the movie tries to dismantle the meaning of evil.  It is an interesting movie to watch if you are an adult with a critical eye, but it is not good medicine for children.

Tuesday, July 4, 2017

Americans Love Sweets not Sardines

Some one in the medical profession recently asked me, "Sardines? How can you eat them?"  I am an adult with a wide ranging palate.  I appreciate all kinds of flavors, not just sweet.  I also explained, that being of Danish origen, it is good for me to eat canned fish.  I also like kippered snacks and picked herring. (The fish oils are very good for you.) I like the flavor of bitter, that is why I like elderberries.  I believe that it is important to eat what ones ancestors ate as we become genetically programmed to need certain nutrients over the generations.

Here in America, people are overly sugared.  They guzzle down sodas and their palates become conditioned to only appreciate sweetness.  It starts at a young age when children are given sweetened cereals for breakfast.  Parents cater to little ones who are afraid of new or different cuisines.  Little children are given sweetened mac and cheese and some of them never grow out of the thirst for sweetness.  I like sweets too.  I like jam made with enough sugar so it is pretty and sets.  I like chocolate covered almonds and nutty pastries.  Flavors are like a rainbow and if you are stuck on one color, it is kinda sad in a way.

My son believes that it is because babies are given formula and that they never get over liking sweetness.  I was given formula as a baby and I like more than one flavor.  All the obese adults hooked on sweets remind me of big babies walking around, masking as adults.  Babies are often chubby.  I dread being overweight.  I have to battle weight due to the shut up shot.  Having made the choice to forgo meat, I have noticed that spiced grains are especially tasty.  Too much meat is bad for the planet and bad for you as well.

Monday, July 3, 2017

Spooky Forrest Selfies









The forrest is an interesting experience when you are out alone.  I did not really desire to interface with any other hikers.  I wanted to commune with nature not other people.  I am glad that I got there relatively early 10 ish or so.   If you go out in the woods today you better go in disguise.......

A Walk Along a Gully in Naples

I saw several chipmunks in the forrest and some flowers.  I think this bush is a wild sweet azalea.



Below is Rubus odoratus or thimbleberry.  It is endangered in some states.




This is me.  I did not dress in hiking clothing, risking the dreaded lyme disease.  I thought I was going to stay in the gully.  I also walked up a very steep path along the gully, where I saw these mushrooms and flowers.  The fine white flowers were very fragrant.

Russula Emetica

While I was  hiking through the forest, I came upon a mushroom that had been disturbed, perhaps by a deer.  Do you see under the stick beside the stick with the mushrooms, two white eyes?  I would bet it is a woodland fairy!


I believe it to be a mildly poisonous Russula Emetica.  Judging by its name, I would imagine one would puke if they ingested it.

Very Old Fossils

Our area of New York state, the finger lakes, has no dinosaur fossils because the rocks that have dinosaurs embedded in them have all been worn away.  The fossils in New York state are very old.   In fact the oldest fossil tree is from the Naples, NY area.  Today I hiked in a gully and brought home two very cool stones.  One is a fossilized mud slide and the other is of bamboo, I believe.  If anyone would like to dispute this that is fine.  Let me know.  It could be an ancient form of the horse tail plant.  In the middle Devonian period they were 50 to 90 feet tall.




The forrest was beautiful this morning.  There were a few other hikers out there, a family with a North Carolina license plate and another group with a big dog.


Sunday, July 2, 2017

Frequent Urination? Try Buttermilk

I have not been drinking much milk at all for months. Because of my shut up shot, I suffer from frequent urination.  I was not plagued by this today.  Let me announce to the world why!!!  I drank a glass of buttermilk yesterday.  I researched it today and sure enough, buttermilk helps with frequent urination.  I don't know if it is the helpful bacteria or what but my spastic overactive bladder is not happening today.    I wanted to spread the world to all the other people, especially the elderly.  You might say, "but butter milk is all fatty."  Nope.  It is thick, not because of fat.  It is thick because it is cultured.  Buttermilk is actually not that fatty.  Fat in the diet  from dairy is okay if you are already a pescatarian (fish eater) .  I rarely eat meat, so fat from dairy is not a problem for me.

Fat Turns into Fat

Fat turns into fat is a statement I have heard which could be translated into oil turns into oil.  Oil is what plastic is made from.  It is cooked to hardened state oil.  What if oil from our packaging is migrating into the fat cells of our bodies?   Perhaps we humans are turning into plastic fatties.  This was a revelation of mine when I went insane last summer.  If one sees pictures of people in the nineteen sixties, hardly anybody was a rolypoly.  Now every where you look in our society, we see rolypolies.  Maybe they are made that way because of all the plastic packaging.  I wonder if plastic is as inert as we believe.  I would bet it is not.  Most everything we purchase comes in plastic.   I don't think we consumers are being treated fairly, being all plumped up without our consent.