Be Forewarned, I am a Fey and Quixotic Creative Writer

Be Forewarned, I am a Fey and Quixotic Creative Writer
And in the End was the Word, Amy's Word

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Friday, July 31, 2015

What is Love?

When I first found myself incessantly thinking about a boy I knew that something was wrong with my mind.  This happened when I was in high school.  Is it possible that I was hypnotized to think about Joe all the time?  I had a Christian psychiatrist in the early 1990's that suggested that part of what I was going through might have been due to covert hypnosis.  In my twenties my mind focused on my brother-in-law constantly.  I thought that thinking about the love in my life was a kind of  psychological shelter.  I don't think that now, love was more of a blind fold.  In my thirties it was imaginings of the pediatrician.  For some thirty years my mind might have been controlled by the escape of "love".  Mind control.  I have been dosed with a sort of Love poison.

Real  Love requires knowledge and interaction with the person.  I had only the barest minimum of interactions with these men.  My infatuations ruled my consciousness.  I believe that I was covertly hypnotized to be man crazy.  If I thought constantly of these men, I would not figure out my multiple personalities and what was really going on.

Real Love is about shared experiences and laughs as well as working through issues.  Real Love entails a magical energy in someone's eyes.  Real love is about caring for the person.  I doubt if I have ever experienced real mutual Love.

I had clues to the true reality. I found my skirt at my sisters house.  My watch was also at her house and I could not recall how it got there.  I believe that there is/was a pornography and prostitution gig going on in my other personalities.  If my baseline personality had an extreme focus, there was less chance of a breakthrough between the personalities.

I wish I could say that I was immune to love, because of the absurdness of my love history.  I know that if Joe Schmoe tried to woo me I would not believe it.  I would say, "So what organization sent you?"

Oh yeah, the CIA organized crime barrier would have to be broken through.  There are people who would be very upset if I got to enjoy a "happily ever after with a Prince!"

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