Be Forewarned, I am a Fey and Quixotic Creative Writer

Be Forewarned, I am a Fey and Quixotic Creative Writer
And in the End was the Word, Amy's Word

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Sunday, December 2, 2012

My Early Years as a Mother--Rewrite from 2012

When I conceived Natalie, we, that is my newly wedded husband and I, were living in Clifton Springs in an apartment on 13 Main Street.  Natalie works across the street from the building where she was conceived.  The conception  was the first cycle of menstrual period after her father and I wed.  I got my menses while on our honeymoon  in October of 1980.  Our honey moon was spent at the Nowbar's cottage and West Bluff Drive, Penn Yan.  A month or so later, I was watching the Today Show on a  November morning in the apartment.  The anchor woman, Jane Pauley, was explaining the consistency of cervical mucous at the time of being fertile.  I think I watched that episode the morning the little wiggly sperm of my husband joined into my egg.  Lets see- Married Oct 25--first cycle of the marriage, Voila! Natalie! I would bet that she is totally unaware that she works across the street from the building where she was assembled......silly....that sounds positively factorial!

I am inspired to write this today of all days because this is the day 30 years ago that I knew that I was going to have a son, also.  I was a little weird back then, I had this thing about having a "son".  I love my children equally now and did when they were little too.  It might be because my Mother and Father had always desired a son and did not get one, that I felt that a son would be such a great blessing.  This notion has permeated many cultures, the Chinese, for one are guilty of this bias.

I was out in the front yard on Taylor Road.  We lived in the country in an old house that had been constructed from a former ice house.  I was in the yard with my daughter and she was on the swing that we had attached to the Butternut Tree*.  I was pushing her on the swing on December 2, 1982, most likely in the morning.  I suddenly had this thought.






  "You will give birth to a son in a year."  I had no intention of trying to get pregnant that forthcoming March and really did not recall this moment until after he had been conceived.  I went to Dr. Yang, my Chinese gynecologist, and he gave me my due date.  I am pretty darn sure that his EDC or due date was December 2, 1983.  He was born December 6, on Saint Nicholas Day.  I had planned to name him Nicholas if he was born that day....but we went with our other choice, Benjamin.  He took Nicholas as his confirmation name.  He turns 29 this week.

When Ben was born at the Newark Hospital Natalie remembers that she had peas that night for supper, I would guess at her Aunt's house.  My mother in law came to visit me and gave me a hug and said "Oh, how nice now you have a  son!"  I recall feeling as though- yes, this is a great gift. I wondered, "Did I deserve such an honor?"  While in the hospital and actually during labor I wore my purple velvet bathrobe my mother had handed down to me and I also wore purple knee socks.  Purple knee socks that matched my purple robe.  While in labor I focused on a photo on the wall, a focal point.  It was the photo of a pine tree with sunlight streaming around it.  I looked at the pine tree and focused my energy on love.  I focused during Ben's birth on the thought.  "I am LOVED".





(My Ex is over on the right of the picture in back, with sister in law in front.  If I remember, that is my brother in law behind me.)  We are having a picnic under the Butternut tree.--June 1984.




I remember shedding a tear for Natalie and I.  It was no longer just she and I as a mother child duet. a Something ended or rather changed, she and I would share our love with little Benjamin. Transitions, even joyful ones require adjustment.

*I have read Kurt Vonnegut novels.  There is one novel in which he goes on and on about a little girl on a swing.  The significance is a style of art, Rococo.  The Girl on a Swing is a sexually charged image.  This probably relates to the objectification of women. It is strange that this connects to my toddler daughter.

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Explanation of Reality dedicated to Nathaniel Hawthorne

I was never mistreated by anybody.

I imagined it all.

I am so glad that society never punishes those who don't conform

or who misbehave

Gossip?  It does not exist

people are kind, gentle and forgiving

manipulative men?  professionals, such as preachers, doctors and lawyers and teachers?

they are all professional

they never misbehave

women mistreated?

are you NUTS?

there is no such thing as misogyny

if you do not believe this,

you need to be medicated

we live in a perfect world

people are gentle, loving and forgiving

you should trust everybody

if you don't you are paranoid

Saturday, October 6, 2012

I Just Invented this Cauliflower Soup

When you have been cooking for 30 years, one day things just gel, and you can just make up a recipe from your head.  Such an amazing event happened tonight.  I had a head of cauliflower, some cheddar cheese, chicken broth and it all came together very well.....
 Steam 3/4 head of cauliflower and puree half when it is tender.
Sautee an onion in some olive oil and then when the onion is tender (translucent) add 1/4-1/3 cup flour.  and throw in a little butter--usually, a "rue" is one to one flour and fat.  prior to the onion getting the flour tossed on top in the kettle (on medium heat), crush some garlic and cook it with the onion until it is just cooked--(garlic tends to burn)
When making a rue, you must cook the flour with the fat for a bout a minute..to cook out the raw flour taste...but I would cook it for a few minutes.  Then pour in some chicken broth and some one percent milk.  I just  poured it in..by eyeballing.  I would guess 11/4 cup each.  Simmer it and add some grated or cut in cubes sharp cheddar cheese.  The amount of cheese: a little over a half a cup.

Cook it till the cheese is all melted in.  add the pureed cauliflower and the other half that is not pureed, (so it has chunks).
I put red cayenne pepper on top--salt to taste.  I ate it with a slice of crusty  bread and a glass of wine.

I am glad that I documented my creative genius in this blog entry!  (so next year I will know where to find my recipe)

By the way, I used to grow cauliflower in a big field behind my dairy barn.   It is quite complicated-beginning to end.  There is a machine that is pulled behind a tractor where a person sites and drops the little baby plants into a furrow.  It has to be sprayed with bug spray--to kill those white butterflies,(green worms are their first stage)  Then when a head begins to form (probably 6-8 wks later)we had to tie up the surrounding leaves (rubber bands color coded by date) and then we went out with a big knife and cut the heads and took them to market.  We knew which ones to cut that day- because of  the color code. We piled them on the top of our station wagon and took them to Marchenese market in Geneva in the early 1980's.  I think that we got about 50- 75 cents a head.

Friday, July 13, 2012

Conversation Between Miss Beetle and Mr Spider

I have always had a fascination with insects.  My girlfriends and I would rescue honey and bumble bees from the waters of Keuka lake while we were swimming.  Usually as humans we don't consider insects to have any significant level of consciousness.  I had noticed this spider web on my windowsill.  It is near where I keep my hose.  I had seen the little spider peeking out.  Dad noticed it today, and I said, yeah, I should video tape it on my Iphone.  I apologize for the blurriness.  I am thinking I might have gotten a little Rosewood oil on the lens from my back porch step project this morning.

I set out to just make of video- of what ever occurred at that moment in the life of Mr. Spider.  He had no idea that he was going to make a fool of himself on YouTube.  What is interesting to me is the way Miss Picnic Beetle looks at him.  She specifically goes up to him, once when she arrives on the scene and again before she departs.  It is as though she is making some kind of speech!  It is also strange how the wind howls when she goes up to him.  Is she the Beetle Goddess of the insect world?  Does she command the forces of nature? ;-)


Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Summer Evening? Ice Cream!

June is dairy month.  I am a former dairy farmer's wife.  That sounds pretty old fashioned.  The title "A Farmwife" sounds sexist.  I can't claim that I was a dairy farmer, though.  I never milked the cows.  I squeegied the milkhouse floor, shoved the hay up to the cows, fed calves, scraped the mangers, unloaded hay, pulled out calves (out of the cow's womb), mowed the farmyard lawn, picked stones, kept the financial records, wrote out checks to pay bills, cleaned the backs of manure with a scraper, managed a vegetable garden which fed the family, pitched out stalls, etc. I guess I did everything but milk the cows and drive tractors regularly.

 This blog post will be about ice cream which is made from milk.  I think though, I might better have put frozen desserts in the title.

Tonight I set out to photograph something I noticed the other day while at the park.  The subject is mildly creepy.  I know the location of a deceased sea gull, which is underwater!  I could not get the prized creepy shot tonight, because the water was too choppy.  My chance will come.  I had my camera with me so I thought I would document the choices for ice cream pleasure here in the Chosen Spot, Canandaigua, NY.

My first choice is Muar House.  They make their own ice cream and Gelato.   They have done some marvelous decorating, using teal blue in one of the dining rooms.  Sandwiches and soup is also on the menu. This is the view of the lake from the Muar House, followed by a shot of the Muar House.







I had my first gelato in 2004 in Italy(I am a cultured snob ;-).  So, while it is not technically ice cream, it has won me over.  It has less fat, so I feel less guilt and I enjoy my treat more.  I especially like the ambiance of Kershaw Park, here, along the lake. I had this donatello (he was a famous artist/sculptor in Italy)

I love THE famous grocery store Wegmans.  But, like many corporations they want a piece of every pie.  Must be a few years ago the corporate big wigs sat around and said, "Look at that- Muar House and Scoops(I will get to them) make money every summer. Hell, that money should be ours!"  "We need to have a piece of that ice cream action."  Consequently they have tried to create the ice cream parlor atmosphere between the checkout, and as you can see, the produce.  How stupid is that?


This grocery store is on Lakeshore drive.  It is very lame, in my opinion.

Before Muar house there has been Scoops, for many years.  Their ice cream is very good.  One can walk across the street to Kershaw Park and eat it up.  My grand daughter and I went last year.  She ordered strawberry and relished every bite.




There are still a few more choices to review.  On the other side of  Lakeshore drive is Abbott's Frozen Custard.  I am curious, I wonder if frozen custard has eggs in it.  It might, as that is the definition of custard.  I used to go there more often.  I really liked a flavor that they used to have: white chocolate almond?  I am not sure, but whatever it was I would top it with nuts.  If you are on 332 traveling north you will pass another Abbotts.  It is tucked into a Tom Wahl's restaurant.  It is for the people who don't need to breath that  fresh lake air and gaze at the clouds while eating their summer treat.  The Abbotts on Lakeshore drive has some cool things, such a miniature lake behind it which attracts ducks.  A few weeks ago my daughter came over to my house with her little girl.  We went to Abbotts and sat by the little lake(Muar Lake).







My former boyfriend and his mother raved about Byrne Dairy Ice cream a few years ago.  It is not situated near water, but, the price is right.  That is why they were impressed with Byrne cones.  Huge cones for two dollars, and, it is real hard ice cream.  I am sure one could order a twist of soft ice cream if desired.  I prefer the hard ice cream or gelato.  The store is on main street, downtown.  I believe that Byrne is local to the upstate area, but I would have to confirm that.  When we drive through town, my daughter gets excited because she can read the sign.  She yells it out.  "Ice Cream!!"  That brought to mind a memory of my grandfather Gus, who loved to sing, "I scream, You scream, we all scream for ice cream!!"