Be Forewarned, I am a Fey and Quixotic Creative Writer

Be Forewarned, I am a Fey and Quixotic Creative Writer
And in the End was the Word, Amy's Word

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Sunday, August 12, 2018

On Taking on the World's Problems

In my delusional state, which is not now a current state, I take on the world's problems.  If I percieve sex slavery to be a problem in society, then I consider that I, myself, must have been a sex slave.  I have no proof that I was ever a sex slave, but I have no proof to the contrary either.  When I was in my manic phase I figured that I had been one.  I imagined many sick scenarios.  I don't go there in my mind, now, while I am stable.  They say that bipolar people cannot deal with ambiguity.  I deal with it every day.  I am also an innocent with a criminal record...I plead guilty out of fear of an unjust system.   I take my antipsychotic shot every month so my ideas are no longer a danger to society.  Sex slavery does exist.  I just noticed that somebody read a blog entry from that time in my life.  I took it down, reverted it to draft.  The blog entry reflected a time when human trafficking was heavy on my mind.  So heavy, I became the victim of a dark world....in my consciousness.

Thursday, August 9, 2018

In Rapture of Raptors

Most who know who I am or read my blog know that I am bipolar.  I came out years ago, and embellished my reputation to the extreme two years ago.  (You can read old blog entries as seek how my sick mind worked!)  I am well now, but continue with an element of magical thinking.  I experienced an interesting moment yesterday with a hawk.  It is not the first time that a hawk has emerged symbolically at a crucial moment.  In 2013 I was thought (erroneously) to be dangerous and was locked up for two months at a state psychiatric hospital.  I was in the social workers office waiting word that my freedom would be impending.  We were waiting, the social worker and I, for a phone call.  As soon as the phone rang I looked out the window to see a hawk swoop in for something, perhaps a kill, maybe not. I was transfixed as the phone conversation ensued and my release from the institution was secured.  It seemed as though the bird flew in on a rescue mission!

Yesterday, I sat at a table with a window to my left.  The speaker at my college orientation for my bachelors degree started his discourse.  Some movement caught my attention out the window.  A hawk alighted on an old dead tree, on the tip top branches.  There was a blind in the window that was open, so I adjusted my eyes and position so that I could make direct eye contact with the bird.  I am unsure what kind of raptor it was......but...we had a moment, and then she took off.

I have always figured that the chickadee is my totem bird, but now I believe the hawk to be one as well.

Tuesday, July 31, 2018

Mushrooms at Millard Fillmore Glen State Park





I went for a hike with a friend and it turned into a mushroom hunt, for photos.  We drove nearly two hours to get to Millard Filmore Glenn.  During the hike it was a steep incline for part of the way, but my heart is in good shape and my muscles are not even sore this morning.





Indian pipes




Ramariopsis kunzei? (whitecoral)  I am a forager, but have no interest in picking and eating mushrooms.  They are so few and far between I just feel that they have a right to exist without being fodder for greedy humans.



Sunday, July 29, 2018

Blue Blobs

I awoke to blue blobs of light in my closed eye vision this morning.  Maybe it was a spirit trying to communicate with me.  It could have been my father as I thought of him while out bicycling the outlet.  Perhaps after we die we see through the eyes of our loved ones.  I was advised that it would please him if I listened to marching music as that was his favorite type of music.

I was advised by him or some other spiritual entity.  Spiritualism is not a sign of insanity, it is a form of faith.  Now that humanity has so many gadgets to be preoccupied with the ways of the past are seen through a different perspective.  The technological persespective dominates the world now and if you talk of spiritual matters you are seen as nuts.  But of course, if you have been trained in spiritual matters by somebody out to make money, that is different.  A natural listener to the dead might be seen as crazy.  The technological and the monetary system is what validates experiences.

I was thinking I might just bring out the poppet of my mother that is tucked in the attic and make a poppet of my father.

Tuesday, July 24, 2018

Rachael Ray Promotes Eating Dead Animals

I was at the car mechanics today and I watched the Rachael Ray show.  I am disappointed with the latest trend in society.  Meat.  Big chunks of meat.  At restaurants these days there are fewer and fewer vegan and vegetarian options.  HELLO?  Is anybody listening?  There is a planetary crisis and the human race needs to lessen its carbon foot print.  Eating lots of meat is bad for global warming.  It is also fatty and unhealthy for people.  Most of all industrial agriculture is cruel.  Many people believe that it is immoral to support the industry and have gone vegan.  On the TV show Rachael featured a man who had written a book about open fire cooking and smoking.  He had his big fat hands all over huge sausages and chops.  It was revolting to watch.  The show should have then featured a expose about the life of a pig.  Showing the animal suffering would have been a good juxtaposition to this carnivore's propaganda.

How is meat agriculture bad for the environment?  The growing of grains for cattle and pigs and chickens uses fossil fuels.  There are more efficient ways to get your protein.  Even if people decreased their consumption to a few meat meals a week, there would be a positive impact on the planet.  The push in the media for more meat consumption probably has something to do with the republicans in political power and their denial of the climate crisis.

I have a personal opinion.  It is based on my white old man theory about who controls the media etc.  Big business agriculture run by the white old men want to promote meat eating.  They want to increase consumption of animals as a rebuttal to the vegan movement.  Rachael Ray might be interested to know that eating dead animals is on the way out.  It is a bore.  I found that when I ceased eating animals my cooking imagination went wild.  It is very challenging and rewarding to switch away from animal flesh. Discovering new spices and flavors of plant based foods is an adventure.

 I am still evolving myself personally, so this might be a little hypocritical.  I still eat cheese and eggs and fish.  I admire those in my family who have moved entirely away from all animal products.  I have been a pescatarian for a year and a half.  When I look at a chicken cooked I now see a dead chicken.  I wonder," am I eating its left or right leg?"  I will eat meat for social occasions, but I do not enjoy it.  I am sensitive and do not want to insult the hostess, but personally I prefer plant meals.  I do feel enormous compassion for the animals in cages and am angered with the way that they are raised.

My grandparents would eat a roast chicken on Sunday and eat leftovers from that chicken for the whole week.  People ate less and were not such devouring carnivores as they are now.  Even if people saved eating animals for special occasions like in the ancient times, it would be an improvement.  "Killing the fatted calf" was only done for holidays and special events.

Remove yourself from your individual identity, imagine yourself up on a cloud watching the human race.  See all the bustling activity below....tiny little chickens in farm yards pecking at the grass, barns with hidden animal nightmares inside.  Little trucks transporting pigs, chickens and cows to slaughter so that the little humans can munch them down on their plates.    See all the tiny refrigerators that need to run to keep the killed flesh from stinking. This is a pattern of behavior that is totally unnecessary for the little human creature's survival.

Shame on you Rachael for your lack of imagination, and for your promotion of habits that need to change.  I call carnivores carnibores.


Sunday, July 22, 2018

Funghi in the Yard

I am excited to share some interesting specimens of funghi found in my lawn.
lacquered bracket

Alpental

Jew's Ear - an offensive name Auriculiaria auricula judea

It is very difficult to identify wild mushrooms as their looks change from day to day.  These are beauties.  This is the advantage of encouraging diversity in ones yard.

Sunday, July 8, 2018

Biking Along the Keuka Outlet Trail

I increased the length of my bike ride to five miles, which takes about forty minutes.  I bike mostly on the outlet.  It is down hill for the first half of the ride and gradual uphill for the return trip.  The air is cool and the trail is forrested.  There is the gentle babbling sound of the outlet as the water cascades over the rocks.  It smells fresh and cool.  I enjoy identifying plant and bird life while out cycling.  Sometimes I stop and eat some black cap raspberries.  Below is turtle pond, which is my most recent turning point.  It is on the opposite side of the old rail bed in relation to the outlet.

 This is a picnic area that I am longing to bring a lunch (and family) to enjoy with me.


This is mullein and of course, daisy.


This is a nice waterfall tributary.  There was a computer monitor laying on the falls rocks, somebody has since cleaned it up and put it on the side of the trail.


I saw a piliated woodpecker this morning.